Blu

I don't like what i'm doing to myself.
I don't like the choices i'm making.
I don't like me.



Yesterday, i got inked. I don't like it when people ask me to stop. I like it. I am still very skeptical about getting my whole arm done...even though i really want it cus it looks so incomplete and ugly now. I wonder....what if my future husband's parents won't accept it etc. Lol. Thinking too far....but what if? I cannot imagine how it'll be like. 2 people in love. So in love, and not being able to get married.

Oh yes...i just checked my emails. Everyone's asking the same question. I feel the pressure. I feel angry with myself. So there'll be a delay (oh yes here we go again you can say~~~) and no, i can't speed things up. If things went well, i'd fly there on the 12, pay for the stocks, hand carry them back but no...thanks to the chaotic situation in Bangkok - where the factory is situated at, i can't go over to collect the stocks! It's Saturday, can't transfer money overseas till Mon. Then the stocks should get despatched on Tue/Wed and arrive on Thur. Fuck it's long. Boy i'm pissed off with the red shirts....And again, i'd like to apologise to all who've been waiting. Last week the situation was ok, so i thought i'd be able to go...who would've expected things to get nastier. :(

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